Haha yesterday and today's really fun :D

Yesterday, for lesson, we learnt new stuff :/ Grade 4 pieces are damn hard :/ To me luh. Craps. And Komala gave me a new score she found. Haha some hymn. It sounded really nice and we were duet-ing :D

Before rehearsal, I had lunchie at Just Acia at Dhoby Ghaut. LOL. Alone again and I read through some of Physics notes. Anyways, I'm like counting how many times I'm eating alone outside. Hahaha. Gaining confidence? I hope I am! :)

Then rehearsal in the afternoon was alright. Michael did come so I could rehearse with him his songs. Then today, before church service at 2.30pm, I rehearsed with Michael at the Chapel because since we're duet-ing, we had to settle bowings etc and we didn't do it yesterday. Before he came, I was in the Chapel alone and I was playing some score that Mr Yang gave us in Chamber. OMG, acoustics at the Chapel was soooo good that I sounded soooo great. LOL! But in actual fact, I play like crap. LOL.

Michael came and we rehearsed together. Hahaha duet-ing is so fun :D
I hope none of us screw up on the real day anyways :) I hope can wear black dress on that day! HAHAHHA. Lol and I felt like a teacher. Cuz he self-learnt violin so.. techniques not so good and I was teaching him some stuff. Hahaha. I'm like crap myself and I still can teach others. Naise.

I didn't go for main service (No Youth) today. LOL. I was doing Math at Dunman Hall. Hahaha. And before that I went to the Chapel again and played the Grand Piano there. Wowwww. Awesome. It's like just me. and the piano. LOL.

Okay, gotta bathe and eat and then.. work again? D:

&the pages keep turning.

Yay, I guess I won't have to touch OP for the next 2 weeks.

Anyways, I kinda screwed up today's rehearsal D: I stoned. Improvement from the GP speech since I stoned longer the last time. But I have dropped from 2 excellents from round 1 of OP and probably to 2 needs improvement this time D: I can do better with script.

But I guess I'm happy about one thing.
I'm improving in my impromptu speech! Just that I sometimes still find it hard to construct good, grammatical and relevant sentences :/

For today, at the start of my presentation, I suddenly stoned. Not because I forgot what my lines were but my mind just went blank D: Cass was prompting me but I just couldn't process what she said and therefore the stoning.

I've rehearsed so many times at home, but I guess it's just different with an audience D: I need to overcome this problem of me stoning and mind blanking out. And I'm determined to! I'm not going to let this affect my whole group's overall performance. But I guess I did the worst for today's presentation luh D: Jiayou!

Hope, faith, love, luck

&the pages keep turning.

It's that period of the time of the month I hate D:

I felt so unwell ever since GP period D: I hate this queasy feeling.
I just wanted to go home badly D:

Lol I put medicated oil, I smell like some crap now. Hahaha.

Anyways, when I reached home, I tried to do as much of Math. And after dinner, I did more of Math and then couldn't take it already, I napped till 9plus and came online to see if any PDub stuff needs to be discussed or done. Argh, tomorrow round 2. Q&A!!Argh.

I feel like I've given up on a lot of things now.
I need to find that strength again. But I don't know howw..

Dig into my soul?

&the pages keep turning.

Thinking and talking about you send tickles down my heart.

Lol. Big joke.

&the pages keep turning.

Lol, I don't think I'm gonna get anything done this morning.
I'm leaving the house in an hour's time. And I don't wanna do anything.

I've been sleeping quite a lot for the past 2 nights because I just wanna get back some of my sleep that I lost in the week. But.. I guess sleep don't get replenished like that.

I was working last night D: Ah Ting said she really didn't have enough people working. So she called Jasmine and me around Tuesday. Jasmine also have her FYEs, but since Ah Ting really needed us.. Then we just reluctantly agreed lor D:

It's been a long time since I last worked. So.. I couldn't really get used to it last night. We weren't too busy but I felt so tired D:

Lesson yesterday was alright. Lol, did more on the sight-reading part :/ Crap, I can't read low notes fast enough :/ TOO MANY LINES. Although it's just 2, but I find it difficult to read those notes fast enough -.- Nice. How long have I been learning music?!! Years. And I still read them so slowly. Nice.

There was no "orchestra"(Keyboards that plays different instruments) practice yesterday because there was no room for us to rehearse. So.. My afternoon's pretty much free. I went to Ajisen early. I reached Ajisen at about 1pm and I did my homework there lor. Couldn't complete a lot because in the middle, I went Pops and went for food hunting.

Drink: Lemonade mixed with Passion Fruit at Auntie Anne's is VERY GOOOD.

I reached Tampines from Hougang at about 12.30pm and I went to eat KFC. LOL, I wanted to study at KFC but I was kinda distracted by the food.. So I just bought something to eat and then left for Ajisen. Lol my 2nd time eating out alone. Growing confidence? Haha hope I am :)

Jenny jie and Ah Qiang said I slimmed down. WOWW YAY! Hahahaha. I've been eating and sleeping immediately on some days of the week :/ So I don't know how I actually slimmed down. Probably cuz stressful week and stuff. Hahhaaha STRESS IS GOOOD?

If I had more courage?

&the pages keep turning.

Today's a pretty long day for me.

I only reached home at 7plus.
No PE this morning because of the rain. And I think Chemistry test killed me. Sure fail :/ I only knew the answer after the test, which is like too late -.-

After school, almost half of our class stayed back, for Chemistry remedial or PDubby meeting. Lol, we were watching SAW at the hub. WTS. Damn gory. I couldn't take one of the scenes, the needle one, and I teared luh. But the rest, about cutting body etc were........ :/ Manageable.. I think? Lols. But I don't like gore and horror :/

After Chemistry remedial, I headed for Gramercy at Paya Lebar. The book I needed for lessons were out of stock. Wohlfahrt Opus 45. Haha. Sounds cool eh! xD So I just got my exam pieces there. Argh. I had to go to Synwin after that (Heng uh, it's not too far) because of the book was out of stock D: And luckily, Synwin had the Wohlfahrt! :D HAHAHA. And the staff who helped me was really really nice. Unlike the one at Gramercy. She sounded so rude and service was really VERY bad -.- WTH.

i once said i wanted to show you the place.
but i guess, it's more like a dream now.

And wowwww, my exam pieces are not easy D: Craps. And Wohlfahrt Opus 45 doesn't seem to be any easier either. Although just finger exercises, but it's pretty hard for me D: And just on violin books, I spent $35+ today :/ And I still went to buy my printer's catridge. Nice. Spent over 50bucks -.- Anyways, hope tomorrow's lesson will be fun! :D

And yay, it's the weekends again. I want my sleeeep :/

Making wonders.

&the pages keep turning.

Previous days had been really lousy.
I wake up feeling like I get strangled because there is just this feeling that I can't seem to breathe properly and I every breath that I take was really hard D: Probably because OP slides were not okay and stuff.

But now, OP slides are okay already :)
And I think I rehearsed well on what I'm supposed to say.
So.. I'm pretty relieved now :D I just have to get through tomorrow's Chemistry test!

Good luck to me. Haven't really studied T.T

And I think there's this flu bug going around D:
A lot of people are falling sick D:
Today Jerrie, Robert and Wen Xiu are absent.. I also didn't meet Jorene this morning because she fell ill and did not go to school D: And it sure was weird going for lessons without them :/ Just hope they get well real soon :/ Or let me get sick also can. Hahaha.

Seven

&the pages keep turning.

Have I ever felt this stressed before?
I guess not.

I felt so much like crying the past 2 days because OP is driving me nuts. I don't really fear tests or promos, but I FEAR OP. I just can't talk in front of the class and my mind goes blank. I've got a lot to work on. I find it so hard to concentrate on school work because I would always have PDub stuff to do.

I'm tired.

I want sleep.

I just want to get over Draft 1 of OP.

Let me get over it.

Let me overcome fears D:

I hope everything will go well tomorrow D:

Last night, I reached home at 7plus and I immediately went to bed after bathing and eating which was 8.30pm. Haha. I woke up about 1.38am or so to study History and then OP slides. I think it's quite cool to wake up at irregular timings. Hah. But I know it's not healthy. I'll try not to do such stuff :/

Then today, we had an external speaker for Civics. He talked about stress management etc. It was a super interesting talk :) I enjoyed it thoroughly! :D

I just hope I don't screw up anything tomorrow. Good luck to me.
I sure need some luck D: And more confidence.

And today I saw Joshua's slides. Omg. Godly imba.
Compared to mine.. Lol.

Needa do work. So ja ne!

Closed up

&the pages keep turning.

Yay (: At least I manage to get some homework done :D

Youth was pretty okay. I could understand most of the thing :D

Today's theme is on: Gossips.

I think it's rather interesting.

Definition of Gossip is when you talk to someone else about something negative about a certain person:
1. Behind their back
2. It might not even be true
3. To bring the certain person's reputation down

The songs we sang were really nice also :)

Tomorrow's the start of a new school term *moans and groans*

A new beginning? (again)
I have to start working hard D:
Before it's too late..

Anyways, I really hate this thing about being inconsiderate D:

Falling deeper and deeper.

&the pages keep turning.

Oh man.. I didn't wake up early today D:
I set the wrong alarm D: Sigh.

Today's gonna be a super busy day.

1. Chiong homework
2. Church
3. WR & OP
4. Chiong homework again D:

Argh. Need some saviour.

And I haven't started any revision.

Yesterday, I reached home pretty late cuz of PDub night meeting. I didn't get anything done cuz I went to sleep immediately after I bathe. Sigh.

But PDub meeting at the airport was pretty cool. Haha we met Lim Pin and his friend at the staff canteen! :D It sure is a good place to study!

Yesterday was the first lesson at Ms Xiao's house. Her house is sooooo neat! (Y) But her house is all the way at Hougang -.- The bus ride there took us 45minutes -.- Thank God Komala's continuing violin lesson too. If not I'll be bored to death, with no one talking to me during this long long bus ride. It was fun! Haha. Anyways, Ms Xiao lent me this book. Wowowow, a lot of classical pieces inside! I have to start preparing for the Chamber assessment D: Jiayou lo.

After that, went home to do OP slides and met Dylan awhile later to get tuner. Yay, I can tune my other violin! HAHAHHAHAHA. But I think this tuner not very user-friendly lei. Nevermind, cheap and can use can already luh. Hahahah!

Fukai, fukai mori

&the pages keep turning.

Today is an uber fun day for me.
But GG, minimal work is done. Lols.

I was out with Jorene since 9plus to 5plus.
We went Mountbatten KFC to study and then walk around at Orchard at about 3pm. I'm so glad that I met her today. Felt sooooo happy. I finally can tell someone about the the thing that I can only share with my soul. I just realised that only she knows my deepest deepest secret. I have 2 currently. Jorene's just awesomez. I also realised that only in JC, I started having secrets. I didn't have any back in TK or EV. Probably because this year has been quite a drama for me :/

I'm just glad to meet her and be able to share stuffs with her..
Things have been kept within me but I feel happy that I can tell her.

Wonder how things are gonna be..?

Then as usual, talked a lot of nonsense which was fun :D Hahaha.

Today, I'm prepared to stay up till 3am.. OP and WR D: Sigh. Jiayou!

I wish I didn't know you
I'm glad I met and know you

&the pages keep turning.

Hahaha. Today's PDub meeting at school was pretty fun!
FATE HAS BROUGHT 3 GROUPS TOGETHER :D
We had lunch together. There was our group, Han Ren's group and Jaime's group! Hahaha. So fun luh :D I think the meeting was alright. Somewhat productive. I kinda looked forward to making the slides, but it turns out to be pretty troublesome D:

I haven't start doing anythinggggggg. GG-fied (Y)

Can I get validated too?

&the pages keep turning.

I'm always thinking of rubbish in my head.
Yes, agree with Mr Ang. I need to think about more important things.

&the pages keep turning.

I'm disgusted now -.-
I just came from Sakae Sushi Tea Time buffet -.- I shall not eat sushi for at least a month. Eeew. I'm too bloated. And I had dinner when I came home. Naise. I didn't take any rice, I just ate the fish and broccoli that Ahyi cooked -.- Anyways, the sad thing is that, we didn't eat the dessert buffet we had plan to and ended up at Sakae because it was close when we reached there at 3.35pm or so D: I wanna eat there D:People Present: Wen Xiu and me (Like some lightbulb*), Martini and Champagne

Anyways, before that, Pdub meeting today was .. :/ Nothing to say.
Productivity comes from home I guess.

I don't think I'm going to do anything tonight. Just PDub stuff ba. We have meeting again tomorrow :/ PDub seriously takes my life away.

I'm contemplating on whether to eat the fruits that Ahyi prepared.
But I'm too full. But.. Fruits help to digest your food D: Argh.

Dareka?

&the pages keep turning.

I realised that all the motivation I had was all lost.
Previously was lazy but motivated.
Now, it's totally unmotivated D:

I want it back D:

Please, I beg you to get out of my head.

&the pages keep turning.

Today, we had PDub meeting.
As usual, we're not very focused. Haha. Our attention span is only about an hour or so. Lol! Tomorrow and Thursday meeting againzz. Lol, hope we'll get things done anyways :)

After that, I went to Bedok Library to get books. Wow, I found some things for PDubby. I think. Lol. And I've always wanted to read a book but have been pretty lazy to go to the library to borrow something. So just now, I borrowed a book! Hahaha. But you know what? I'll probably return the book unread. LOL. We'll see.

When I reached home, the house was empty :/ So I decided to go study room to study. Argh. I was just distracted and couldn't concentrate that well. I know the reason why. And the air-con was a bit too cold there :/

I'm blogging now cuz I'm distracted about various stuff. Argh.
I need to focus! D:

I know the reason why.

&the pages keep turning.

Hellooo. I think rehearsal on Saturday was awesomez :D
I still had some screw ups once in awhile but it sure was fun playing violin! And..... Omg. I'm going to play 7 songs on the real day of performance. 5 on my own with the other pianists and 2 pieces are with Michael and the pianists. Michael didn't come on Saturday, so I couldn't rehearse our parts together..

I realise the actual day of performance is on the exam week D:
Sigh, I needa make sure I manage my time well. Really really well.

Church yesterday was okay. I kinda understand. Haha.
The theme was "I can choose to be a peacemaker" or something like that. And they were talking about conflicts and stuff like that. Aww man.. D:

After that, went to attend Vanessa's Concert. Whoa.. The soloist is really pretty! She wore this white dress. Woo! (Y) After her concert, plus Ming Xuan, Victor and Vanessa's family, we had dinner together. Haha. The Ramen tasted quite good :)The concert was kinda cool, overall :D

Today. 4hours of History! I survived it! Hahaha.
It wasn't so bad luh :D I think Mr Seng was in a super good mood today, if not he would have scolded us like mad just now. Lols.

I'm kinda sleepy D: I wanna sleep D:

Searching my soul

&the pages keep turning.

Yay! It's the start of the holidays!
But.. I don't think it's gonna be like a holiday. Since there are many things that need to be completed and with PDub OP coming up, it's not goinna be a break. Definitely no. Nonetheless, we get to wake up a little later. Lol holidays are good for replinishing sleep I guess.

Teacher's Day holiday was kinda wasted by me. I spent a lot of time doing the GP Speech and I manage to complete minimal amount of work D: Then on Thursday, I totally screwed up my speech D: I just stone. Probably out of nervousness, I couldn't remember anything. I think the speech that I prepared was quite good eh D: Sad.

Dylan, Emm and me also took Math test. I thought I'd get single digit though. Not difficult if you studied I think. But I didn't revise much. And I had the formula sheet but I didn't use it. GG -.- I was trying to recall some formula that I couldn't remember but was inside the formula sheet -.- Naise (Y)

Then on Friday, Mr Ang gave us back our paper. Wow. I passed. Barely. SO MANY CARELESS MISTAKES. WTS. And the careless mistakes were all in the first part. First part wrong, the rest wrong also luh, naturally. WTS. I'm seldom this careless!! Don't know what's wrong with meeee!!!!!!

The marks wasn't something that affected me because they were above my expectations, but the comments that Mr Ang gave me was like a dagger stabbed into my heart. Ohmigosh. It's piercing. I felt so guilty for disappointing him so much..

"Vivi, you disappoint me. I trusted you by choosing you as a mentor. This should not be the way you lead by example. I chose you over Jia Sheng because I felt that you were more consistent and more inclined in Math. I am not giving up on you but you need to redeem yourself! Spend less time on things that won't value add to your grades. In JC, studies is not one of the most important aspects, it is THE most important!!"

Omg. But I think Jia Sheng is better than me in Math by infinite times. Redeem myself huh. I need to. I need to do well for Promos. Or at least better than JCTs. My studies have never been this bad in my whole life. Maybe I haven't been focusing on my studies so much. I'm not working anymore also, so more time to do school work and do revision. I don't want to let anyone down. And I don't want to let myself down either D: I've got my own expectations to keep up to and I hope they can be met D:

Jiayou to me luh D:

The previous night, I stayed up till 2.40pm to do EoM D: Felt really tired at school. And during work, I wasn't in the mood for anything cuz my eyes just wanna close D: We were very busy last night. Probably cuz only 7 of us were on shift D: And I think Ah Lai is not a very organised person. Compared to Ah Ting. Somehow, I miss Ah Ting a bit :/ But.. She hasn't been feeling well, probably cuz of her baby in her stomach. Hahaha.

I think Li En will be kinda happy to hear that Ah Ting's pregnant!
LI ENNNNN. COME TO BY BLOGGGGG! Hahaha.

And there's this auntie working there D: Experienced one. But she likes to order people around. I thought it was just me, but I've got another colleague who doesn't like it too D: Sigh. Anyways, I remember last year, our TM Ajisen staff were all experienced and they have been working at Ajisen for years. And we were close :) Then whenever someone's birthday is coming up or last day, there will be a mini celebration. I remembered when I was going to quit Ajisen in January, they held a mini celebration in conjuction with Auntie Ying Hua and Sharon jie's birthday! HAHA they bought me a present also and it was really coool :D Ah Ting even treated me to Tartufo! Tasted really good :D Haha.But now.. We're not that close anymore. Because staffs come and go D: And they don't work long D: It's quite sad to see how friendship don't get maintained..

Anyways, I won't be working for the next month. till Promos and over. AWESOMEZT! But it means.. No money!! D:

Oh yea.. I'm not too sure why I don't feel like spending much money these days. That's kind of a surprise because usually I'll spent a lot of money on food/drinks -.-

Good sign maybe? Or bad?

Who knows.

&the pages keep turning.